A Fashion Police Time Out With Sean Avery

As many of you know, my fondness for former New York Ranger goes beyond a healthy love.  If asked to rank my top 10 favorite hockey players of all time, Mr. Avery would make it.  Annoying Martin Brodeur is fairly low on my favorite reasons, take away the man’s doughnuts and he’s cranky, but manage to anger the entire hockey watching world and be New York City’s darling?  That’s talent.  For a few bright moments, Sean Avery was Prince of New York.  

But with such a sparkling personality, he didn’t last long and has since fallen off-- UNTIL TONIGHT!

Tonight Sean Avery was a guest host on the E!’s Fashion Police with Joan Rivers, Kelly Osbourne, George Kotsiopoulos, and second guest host Alyssa Milano.  I’m here to review it for you.  

After Joan Rivers called Sean Avery the “Jay Leno of hockey” and his proclamation of being a big teddy bear off ice, the group discussed his work involving gay rights and his internship with Vogue Men.  The mumbly Avery informed us that he kissed both a woman and man in his 7ForAllMankind ad campaign directed by James Franco and that he had a hard time believing that there aren’t guys in the NHL locker room who started playing the sport to see more naked men.  

But this night was about fashion:

First up for review was the 4th best dressed athlete of the month, Serena William and two of her dresses, and shockingly could identify her Victoria Beckham dress.  He was nothing but polite, saying it was nice to see her take risks but to maybe cover up her back a bit more.  A far cry from his more famous soundbites.  

Tom Brady was second on their list, and 3rd overall, of fashionable athletes and it was even more shocking to see him being nice.  I would have put $20 on him saying something crude and rude about a fellow fashion icon.  The worst?  He was surprised Tom Brady allowed himself to be photographed in an Ugg store wearing a cardigan.   Which I guess is the worst he can say, we’ve all seen his clothing choices.  

Maria Sharapova was his third and final athlete and probably got the worst review.  The photo the show selected for her really showed off her height and Avery compared her to Brigitte Nielsen.  However he did say she looked like Nielsen from Rocky, and did clarify that she was hot in Rocky.  I guess my mental image of Nielsen is less Rocky and more Flava Flav.  

At the end of his segment, Avery gave Joan Rivers a gift of a (used?) jock and cup as well as what looked like a fuschia Saturday by Kate Spade (or maybe just Kate Spade) envelop wallet.  

For those curious, Avery’s shirt was by Prada, his black slacks by Phillip Lim, and his shoes by YSL.  

And for 2013, David Beckham was named most fashionable at the end of the show.  

I’m disappointed Sean Avery was not Number One.